Why do we press harder on a remote control when we
know the batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds"
when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are
four billion stars, but check when you say the paint
is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle it comes in?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by
lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but
ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still
apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you
use the bubbles are always white?
Is there! ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator
with hopes that something new to eat will have
materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen
times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down,
pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give
the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the
end you first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed
light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our
ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing
so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't
all right so why don't we say, "That hurt, you
stupid idiot?"
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch
something that's falling off the table you always
manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm
as it was in! summer when we complained about the
heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try
doing it like your wife told you to do it?
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every
four persons is suffering from some sort of mental
illness. Think of your three best friends, if
they're okay, then it's you......
