Bayleigh's Bathtub Debut

After much ranting and raving from anyone that's been through puberty and having their parents show off nudie pics from when they were a baby...here's one for Bayleigh - with a wash cloth as cover. She's the baby's baby, so no doubt she will get the wash cloth PLUS whatever else she wants as time goes on.

At less than two months of age she has yet learned to cry due to unforeseen (NOT!!!) Grandma issues, as well as aunts, uncles and various Arkansas kinfolk that break legs to give her what she needs. LMAO

Gotta love that little Herky Jerky.....

Texas Chili Cook-Off

Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better. For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is.

They actually have a chili cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio city park. The notes are from an inexperienced chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield, IL.

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Coors Light beer truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."

Here are the scorecards from the event: Frank is Judge #3.

Chili # 1 - Eddie's Maniac Monster Chili...

Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.

Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.

Judge # 3 -- (Frank) Holy sh*t! What the hell is this stuff?! You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put out the flames. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

Chili # 2 - Austin's Afterburner Chili...
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor; needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

Chili # 3 - Ronny's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili...
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.

Judge # 2 -- A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.

Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill... My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting sh*t-faced from all of the beer...

Chili # 4 - Dave's Black Magic..
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.

Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish, or other mild foods; not much of a chili.

Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb. woman is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

Chili # 5 - Lisa's Legal Lip Remover... Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead, and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticked me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.

Chili # 6 - Pam's Very Vegetarian Variety...
Judge # 1 -- Thin, yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.

Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.

Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulphuric flames. I sh*t on myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

Chili # 7 - Carla's Screaming Sensation Chili...
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.

Judge # 2 -- Ho-hum; tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress, as he is cursing uncontrollably.

Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me I've decided to stop breathing; it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

Chili # 8 - Karen's Toenail Curling Chili...
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold, but spicy enough to declare its existence.

Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild, nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 farted, passed out, fell over, and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor fella, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?

CF and OO

I've been digging a little further into reading about OO & CF, but don't have much time to blog today. So here are a couple of articles if you're interested... Living in OO Land: http://halhelms.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=newsletters.show&issue=011005_LivingInOOland An OO Aproach to War: http://www.sys-con.com/story/?storyid=45622&DE=1

Cold Fusion

While I'm on the subject of birthdays I might as well go ahead and let all of you know that it's Cold Fusion's 10th birthday. LMAO If you don't know me, I'm a CF junkie and have been for several years now. Since version 4.5, whenever that was, and version 7 was just released. I must admit that I'm somewhat concerned about Adobe acquiring Macromedia, and what that mean as far as a CF developer is concerned. On the other hand, I can't imagine two companies like these two merging and something good not coming of it. The CF community is finally starting to realize and implement OOP as much as possible - which is a plus for those of us that have some experience with VB.NET or a similar language. Some of the coolest new features in CF7 is the ability to create PDF or Flash documents easily (almost too easy) and great looking forms without pulling your hair out. Take a look at the new features offered in CF7 for yourself! Visit: http://www.macromedia.com/software/coldfusion/

Happy Birthday Ginger!

Happy Birthday Ginger (aka Herky Jerky Jr.) !!!

Happy Birthday Tana!

To celebrate Tana's 10th birthday we took a road trip to Hot Springs, Arkansas and played at Magic Springs. This picture was taken on the Log Ride by the cameras that are setup at Magic Springs. We stayed in the amusement park side for a couple of hours then spent the rest of our day in the water park side. I'll post more pics that we took ourselves once we get them developed.